I now better understand from therapy that overworking is a trauma response. The moment I heard this, I thought, but it’s all I know, yet it is also the moment I realized I couldn’t continue as is. 

I am a Black Woman who has imperfectly navigated a nontraditional path into executive leadership while working in for-profit and nonprofit sectors. It’s never been easy for me, yet there are very few safe spaces where I can tell my unfiltered story. 

I decided to tweet about unlearning overworking as just a random thought, but the retweets and responses taught me valuable lessons.

You see, I am aware of the imposter syndrome and feeling like you may not be fully qualified to do something even if you are, but this is something different. 

I am not the only one feeling overwhelmed by continuing to perform at the highest levels of excellence while ignoring the physical and mental toll it takes on your well-being.

You can be well accomplished and continue to overwork, and one day an ally can turn into an adversary. No manual prepares you for the aftermath, yet you must find a way to maintain your sanity. 

Forbes recently released an article called “The Infuriating Journey From Pet To Threat: How Bias Undermines Black Women At Work,” finally, there is a name for what I have been feeling in isolation after achieving extraordinary success in mostly all-white spaces. 

According to the article, “Black women, seen initially as likable, moldable novices, become more suspect as they grow in their jobs and exert the influence and authority they have earned.”

One day, while in a women’s group as the only Black Woman, I decided to share my thoughts on my challenges while navigating my career path. I was immediately gaslighted and told it undermines my leadership to show weaknesses and moments of vulnerability. If I want to continue being successful, then I must look perfect and nonthreatening. I couldn’t possibly have any problems because I had a title and accolades. I left feeling like it was a waste of time, especially since the purpose of the meeting was to empower future generations to be successful in their careers.  

In hindsight, I was being told to overwork, pretending I don’t have any problems even though it denies my humanness. 

I often wonder about the physical impact of experiencing, reading about, and seeing racism play out daily in clips that go viral on social media. 

60 minutes released insight into how Black Americans are more prone to health issues because of racism.

The key takeaway from the segment is the impact of constant exposure to adversity. It doesn’t matter how educated you are or how much money you make; racial disparities can negatively affect your health. You can’t overwork yourself out of facing this reality. 

Lately, I have been taking more time to reset and scale back my efforts to do everything to the point of overworking. 

It is a complete shift for Black Women to prioritize mental health and wellness publicly. I am so proud of young Black athletes  for placing mental health as their top priority over the expectations of perfection in competitive sports.

As more Black Women become influential leaders, there must be a space for us to thrive without burning out through the foggy lens of overworking.

Yet, it is also essential to uncover the secret of the visible power of being different.

The power is in using impactful career experiences to build a business portfolio.

My path involves a mid-career transition after a layoff into the nonprofit sector.

I have leadership experience in the aviation and defense industry for thirteen years.

The second chapter of my career is leading nonprofit education initiatives.

I decided to reimagine myself successful versus trying to reinvent myself. I acknowledge the feeling of failure after a layoff while working part-time to gain a new set of skills.

“We have to reimagine ourselves in this American landscape. You won’t survive if you don’t do that. Reinvent means you don’t like yourself.”

Sonia Sanchez

This career transition process of reimaging myself takes several years to complete.

It is critical to have someone to talk to as you navigate through the uncertainty.

You will have self-doubts because of fear of the unknown.

You must keep moving forward without knowing what the outcome will be.

A crucial part of any transition is remaining confident. It is best to stay humble enough to know that your past habits may no longer work in the present.

The part-time work leads to a full-time leadership position in which I thrive.

The reality is being a lifelong learner is a high priority. 

It is about reframing experiences to learn from them. You have to learn to let go of following an ideal checklist of standards.

It is not about denying experiences or failures. The beauty of life is in finding the power to stand in your uniqueness.

Now that you know there is power in being different, let’s take the following steps to make it impactful.

The first step is taking charge of your professional development.

According to a Career Builder Survey, “Many employees want to get ahead in their career but aren’t offered educational opportunities to learn the skills needed to do so. If offered, 73% of employees whose companies do not currently offer educational opportunities or workshops outside of work hours say they would be likely to participate if they were available.”

Professional organizations outside of work also help provide educational opportunities.

I joined several organizations to enhance my communication and leadership skills.

Now I can lead multigenerational teams as a GenX leader.

There are hot topics about generational differences. Yet, success is collaboration in inclusive environments.

The LinkedIn 2020 Global Talent Trends report, says, “56% of companies say they’ve recently updated policies to appeal to a multigenerational workforce.”

Inclusive environments also need to allow each person to develop a sense of style.

The second step after developing a sense of style is to cultivate it through creativity.

The secret of creativity is the idea of using self-competition to stand out.

Self-competition is about continuous improvement. The benefits also include understanding the stages of a business life cycle.

The practical applications can then lead to developing transferable skills.

The creativity of a distinctive leadership style with quantifiable results establishes brand credibility.

The third step after establishing a distinctive leadership style is consistency.

There is power in being consistent at what you do, especially when it comes to being on time.

If people know that you will deliver results, you will gain brand ambassadors.

These brand ambassadors are a part of the social capital you need to flourish. It serves the purpose of amplifying your voice as unique for buy-in from your career audience.

The buy-in leads to your natural influence to become visible.

The fourth step is to empower others to stand out through your leadership.

It will show that you not only know how to own your power to be different; you can help others do the same.

The leader who lifts as he or she climbs is essential to the health of any organization.

The final step is shaping your career portfolio as a story too good to be on the sidelines.

Imagine you are one of several qualified candidates for a position.

It will be time to show how you can form new relationships to strengthen the customer’s business.

My interview for Vice President of Education and Programs highlights using this strategy.

My for-profit and nonprofit experience in Aerospace Engineering stands out.

Additionally, my prior involvement in STEM Education initiatives increases my credibility.

I reimagine myself daily to ensure I am progressing forward.

Your call to action is reimagining yourself succeeding despite unfavorable circumstances. The answer is in embracing the secret of the visible power of being different.

Tomorrow is a new day for you to continue to master standing out through your uniqueness.  

I understand why overworking is alluring- especially if you feel like you have to continually prove your capabilities in rooms where you are the unrepresented voice.  The reality is that maybe it is time to move on and or change careers, yet it isn’t always easy to make the transition.

A 2015 survey found that among working adults who wanted to change careers, 94% of them said they face barriers that prevent them from making a change.

The stress of trying to overcome barriers and achieve perfection in the process is an ideal rarely accomplished without side effects.  There can be a struggle to identify how to market your capabilities when deciding you want to move on from a job if you aren’t comfortable advocating for yourself. There is another barrier in this situation, locating the best job references when your current supervisor may speak of you unfavorably.

Earlier in my career, a friend of mine at the age of 25 was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Before the diagnosis, my friend is facing the challenges of anxiety and feeling devalued while working harder to reach a moving target for success. I remember going to the hospital with her a few months before she passed away and thinking to myself, “How much did anxiety and stress play a part in the illness?”

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, Generalized Anxiety Disorder(GAD) affects 6.8 million adults or 3.1% of the U.S. population, yet only 43.2% are receiving treatment.

I have come to grips with my anxieties and the impact of stress on my well-being.  I recognize life is not all work, especially if you are committed to being an advocate. You have to draw a fine line on when to say no, even if it means losing some friends or associates in the process.

I decided to become an advocate supporting STEM/STEAM education after pressing forward after being both laid off and fired as a mid-career engineering professional.  As an African American woman and executive, I have to embrace failure and being the only person who looks like me seated at tables of influence.  I also know the impact of the systematic and unconscious bias you can face daily and share stories of how to overcome these obstacles as well. The advent of social media has taken biased public opinions to 24/7 access, and you have to filter it all and decide what to take in as feedback. You also have to know when to let go of other people’s expectations of you.

In a recent Facebook post by Stephanie Drenka, she mentions the need for self-care when you are in activism/advocacy work:

“The reality is- not everyone is built for non-stop public-facing activism/advocacy work. It doesn’t mean they’re not doing the work. There are different levels of risk, consequences, and sacrifices for people in speaking out, but there are also various ways we can spark change in our own spheres of influence.”

Stephanie’s words are a breath of fresh air. I have for months been trying to write this blog post and telling her I would. Today, I realize my hesitation in finishing this blog is trying to find the perfect words for something that isn’t.

Below are the words that flow naturally to express the emotions of someone who is in activism/advocacy work and continuously questioning the path:

“Like an eagle with broken wings
I fly in uncertainty
Like an image in a faded picture
I am only half of what I see
I’m discouraged and bombarded by fear
I want to cry, but I haven’t been able to shed a tear
I want what is best for me
I struggle to find the path to my destiny
I try to pretend and find passion in things that my heart isn’t in
I ponder and ponder so much that my mind starts to wander
I’m troubled because I don’t know which way to go
I cannot travel two roads.”

There is a price of success; it is up to you to find a sense of balance within your scope of influence.